I can see again!!

My ORANGE that is….

Syracuse boys have returned!!! from their pathetic playing over the past few weeks

Syracuse 75 Kanas State 59

Welcome to the Sweet Sixteen BABY!!!

UM…. How are y’all’s brackets doing now….. small recap below

UCONN…… GONE

DUKE…… GONE

MISSOURI…… GONE

KANAS……. GONE

Thank you for shooting, its been awhile

Not the best boys, you still need to prove why you were #1 for those 6 weeks BUT you played with your heads, it looked like basketball…. Congratulations!!! Don’t let it go to your head

Waiters, was that three 3 pointers in a row… yes it was!

Now I’m short, but wow did you see that block in the second half by Southerland…. Oh being 6’8 must rock!

Hello defense (in the second half) Kanas could not block Syracuse it was kind of epic.

Plus, I got a few giggles out of Frank Martin’s hissy fits

Um…. Frank Martin said it best

 "We give Syracuse credit rather than fault our guys, They attacked us. They're not 35-2, or whatever they are, because they kind of fooled people. You know, they're good." – Frank Martin, Kanas State head coach

Oh & nay sayers, Melo is great but he’s not the whole team! But Kanas was missing their golden player as well.

So, you can color the sweet 16 ORANGE

Now, let’s see Ohio State leave too… Gonzaga you’re playing smart… keep it up 

Ok... Here's the FINE PRINT

FINE PRINT? YEAH, THERE IS NONE

A lot of people call it shakes, heck I have but I would say smoothie or milk shake.  The word shake alone makes me think of those yuckie chalkly thick drinks (if you can even call them that) that come in a can…. These um? NO cans, but flavor packed.

 They are like Dunkin Coolattas®, or Panera® Smoothies or Starbucks® frappuccinos. They taste amazing.

The best part you can add almost anything to them. Fruit, Juice, Soda, Milk, Coffee, Veggies, Grains, Sweets, Preserves, Yogurt, Hot Fudge… etc

Endless, yeah I’ve had a few repeats because I love some of the ones I “created” as well as some of the recipies from Visalus.

 It can be used for weight loss, weight maintenance AND weight gain

The Vi-Shape® Nutritional Shake mix

 

- No gritty texture….. AMEN ‘nough said

- No after taste

- Tastes like cake mix, well I think it tastes like uncooked muffin mix, but its good!!

- Lower in sodium, fat & carbs than other shakes & diet food… I love lean cuisines but omg one meal is ½ your daily recommended intake…. That’s HIGH

- No added sugar or some nasty, amazing tasting sugar compound, NO fructose!!

- There is actual science behind these… unlike many others. Science in the mix development as well as in the results from people, yes clinical tests! Double blind might I add

- 3 special proteins for fast, and long lasting hunger control,

- Targets fat and lactose removal…. No hormone spikes, which means good for women during monthly times and for body builders

- No bogus detox or chemical flakes or restricted food or recommended excessive, unsafe water intake. (yes, over 80oz of water intake daily is unhealthy, leave a comment I’ll show you the proof)

- REAL ingredients include digestive enzymes to help maximize protein absorption, prebiotics to support the bodies detox process and digestive health, vitamins, minerals,

calcium, and more.

- Affordable… No other plan can offer these benefits plus be light on your wallet…. pretty much every shake is less than $2.50 that’s cheap…. & heck it fits in my budget, which not many things do although I try

Ok… I’m a scientist so here was the selling point for me

- No protein overdose! Do you know how many of those shakes & supplements are way over the daily recommended amount of protein intake? EVEN for body builders & athletes.

- Um… you might not care now, but once you’re on that list for a kidney transplant, you will…. (want more details? Just ask)

Here Goes... you can join me too

Ok.... um I have had a semi-recent addition to my life & needless to say it’s very unwelcome!

(ok.... big gulp this is me now)

  

(here's some back-story)

I always been petite, and played sports throughout grammar school & college. I finished my bachelor's and entered full time grad school with full time work.... HELLO NO LIFE

well working 65 hours+ a week plus grad school, welcome, work-world-25... (kinda like the freshmen fifteen)..... I'm petite it looks awful & even makes showering uncomfortable. It sucks cause it shows everywhere, my face is puffy plus acne decided to show up again! Plus I'm 5'1 so it shows!! My wardrobe rarely fits, what does, I look like a 50 year old amish lady!  (not that anything is wrong with being amish)

(a few years ago prior to the new addition)

I snacked, binged, ate anything in site, just crappy face stuffing.... plus I love food, (Hello! I'm Italian) plus not being active and of course overwhelmed and stressed, clothes fitting tighter AND lovely rolls flowing over the tops of my pants, lumps hanging down past my swim suit & my thighs touching when I walk/sleep.  It’s just not welcomed, BUT I get stuck.  I love food, get upset, eat more then get even more upset. Ughhh!

Did I mention I am a point in my life, where I'm not sure what's right? I feel overwhelmed! Life has different plans than I did. HA!  Not exactly, what I wanted nor choice #5 but hopefully I can reach my dreams this way (right?)

I honestly do not know where to find time to work out, plus, I'm in an area with limited connections and food has become a closer & closer friend. (working out at a gym freaks me out, it’s a mind game I lose over & over & over again) plus I get home from work/school I’m tired I want to do nothing… oh yeah I tried work out videos but they are though when I’m not coordinated, I look like a spazzing monkey, not to mention no dvd player & WAY TOO SMALL computer screen

I mentioned I was a tad lonely? oh no I didn't, if you didn't get that from my post thus far, I am.

So, I know there are other things I need to work on, but I figured I can start with the “whole food is my bff” thing first. I wanna replace my food bff with a real person & maybe just maybe find me a man!

(see.... aren't I dazzling?...HA)

 

I'm not good with consistency, What.So.Ever.

I like dreaming & I read blogs getting joy from their news & triumphs. Yeah I said that and I know I’m pathetic but it’s on the list for the therapist. HA

Introducing my friend (I hope she’s ok w/ me calling her that) Miss a’la mode

I read her blog & love it… plus got some pretty sweet decorating ideas from it, I’ll share soon

I read post THIS post

I cried, no bawled. (yeah I’m a crier, was nicked-named puddle in my past, I cry. Prolly too often or too quickly and when I mad/pissed/sad/stressed but we’ll add it to the list)

It spoke to me… like clouds parting & angels singing.

Maybe because I want to her be my bff or maybe because she’s 1000% real or maybe because I believed her or maybe I’ll never know what “it” was

BUT

I decided I loved love love smoothies/shakes and I needed my rolls & sags to go away

So, I started the 90-day challenge, 

(and cause I wanted to feel a part of something)

  

Side note: I’m a chemist and highly highly skeptical, I get entranced with infomercials but then go and do my own research and realize how damn good marketing these people/companies con artists have

Well I got shake mix in the mail; I started with the Basic pkg, because um $100 a month sounded like a ton of money. I did major research, plus a few tests.

This stuff is legit, plus it does not give me the runs!!!

A 90-day nutrition challenge. Why? Because its real and not crap… that is backed by legit science not marketing or celebrities or pretty packaging. On top of it all, it WONT over work your kidneys due to protein over doses (I’ll get back on that soapbox another day)!

Heck, I switched from my Basic pkg to the Shape pkg in 4 days!!! It’s a deal, I spent a fraction in groceries in the past two weeks, than what I’m used to. I’m saving money & losing weight!!!

These shakes are damn good; the mix smells like cake mix, tastes like sweet cream.

 

The best part? You can make whatever type shake you want! I love variety and have been on this challenge for two weeks and have had over 25 different shakes. Add fruit, ice cream, juice, yogurt, chocolate, peanut butter & tons, tons, tons more

I love it and I hate diets, yeah I’ve cheated but I’m down both in the lbs. & inches!!

Join me

Join me

Join me

Ok, I lied… the best best best bestest part?

Support, I have not smiled, laughed or cried (happy tears) this much since maybe childhood. The support through our facebook group is awesome. I feel like a kid at Christmas, people say “hi”… “this is how I’m doing” “did you try this awesome shake” and “hey, you cheated who cares, new day”

I can’t wait to get on my computer to give some extra support to other challengers but even more, get some for me. I do not even know ANY of these people in my real/non-internet life but they support me! BY CHOICE. It’s awesome and cheaper than therapy.

Come on, you know you want too

*** it fits in my budget & mine is smaller than the width of a dollar bill

Join me, ask questions & enjoy feeling better

http://www.misserandom.bodybyvi.com

missierandom@gmail.com

March Madness Baby!!!

So, for all you that do not know, I grew up near Syracuse, NY and pretty much Syracuse basketball is something you're born into. Well being female & 5 foot tall, I knew I was never going to be on the men's basketball team... but one die hart fan here people..... Did I mention we are #1 in our conference?? (yes I say we, cause um yeah I'm a part of it in my dreams)

but....

Holy Lordy.... we have been playing like crap & its been a complete roller coaster..... (short re-cap)

First beating UCONN

then beating UCONN at UCONN.... pretty freaking awesome

but then forget how to play basketball, till the last five minutes of the game at the Big East vs Cincinnati.... which yeah Cincinnati, get out of our confrence but you guys played awesome... us NOT SO MUCH....

then only win the first round due to some bogus calls....

Die Hart fan but this is a wake up call Syrcause... START PLAYING BASKETBALL!!!!

Come on Syracuse....

Start #4 HAHA.. is this going to be the last?

Look over my many previous posts. I have a friend (in heaven now) named Mallory Code. She was prolly the best person ever, Outside & In (minus the cystic fibrosis)

Anyways, I am me. As much as I try to change it, there are things that will be me, forever and always. Mallory knew this and she excelled. She inspires me and in a crazy way keeps me on track. So, I've decided if I write it down, it will keep me more on track to being the best Erin I can be...(no I am not an Army brat or ever plan on enlisting, um... boot champ? impossible. 'nough said) I need to stop trying to change it & accept it... yeah easier said than done... heck I got the therapy bills to prove it HA! (but seriously I do)

1.) Perfectionist I want it to work, the way I planned it in my head.

2.) Hard Impossible on myself did I mention I have issues with acceptance? I get really upset when things I think I can control do not go right.

3.) A Complete Contradiction Yes I said contradiction NOT hypocrite... I can be nuts and sometimes do not care about what others think and go on my merry way with a thousand silly looks & comments said under breaths... BUT other times I care way tooo much.

example #1 I cannot spell worth crap, sometimes spell check cannot even decipher the words I'm trying to write

example #2 why this blog has so many starts, do people really want to ready all my crazy? do I really wanna show the world my crazy?

example #3 I wear dressy clothes to work every day, but I'm a chemist and its silly being so dressed up to go in a lab, (yeah ruined a ton few shirts) I'm more professional looking than anyone there, but I like it so humph!

4.) I get weighed down by my past I forget I'm not the only one in this world. So, when things happen or I remember grammar school (hell) I get ashamed/depressed when I need to realize its the past, its happened to everyone & I'm not that person anymore

5.) I cannot see what others see... me? a survivor? strong? um... no I pretty much glaze over the sucesses and concentrate on what went wrong. (see number 1&3)

6.) I'm creative and I love it.... I miss planning parties/weddings, scrapbooking, painting whatever... I makes me in such a good mood (yes I still niut pick my final product) & I need to make time for it

7.) great at excuses I should go to the gym, I don't. ... figure the rest out for yourself

8.) STUBBORN as all hell... yeah you can tell me something till I'm blue in the face but I need to fall flat on face to really get it

9.) I'm sarcastic  maybe to the point where it gets me in trouble

10.) I occasionally lack common sense, but stupidity drives me up a tree


I have NO idea what song it is.. (hell I have an ipod still in its shrink wrap from 5 years ago) but
"this real"
"this is me"
and no the parts of the song do not fit in the blog!

Start #3... I think

I started this blog when I lost my friend Mallory Code to Cystic Fibrosis. Though her CF was the last thing you would ever know about her. She was beyond amazing and had a heart that was beyond words, but more than anything she always had a smile on her face and took every part of life on with theory of I'm learning to dance in the rain. Maybe this blog will pose as a reminder to see the good in all, accept anyone/anything. I want/need to keep this a constant in my life. So, lets raise our glasses to try #3

(Quick Note)

Dancing in the rain, to me isn't really about dancing, because basically I rarely dance, I'm extremely self conscience and have the rhythm of a toad. Yeah I care WAY TOO much about what people think of me. Its almost crippling. It is about finding the best in everything and rising above the "crap" life hands you. I will may complain or whine in the process but I'm learning to dance in the rain to find an inner calm, overall peace, and maybe, eventually, bits of happiness.  So in the words of OneRepublic, Its a good life and I'm finding out why.

(Yes, I've said this before but I'm random and repetitive and this is my blog)

I've always joked with my mom that I'm the queen of complaining and I'm proud of it, trust me she would prolly agree that complaining was/is one of my hobbies, BUT I'm working on it. I need to constantly remind myself that there are a lot of blessings in my life and the struggles are necessary for me to appreciate life. More importantly I'm not alone, EVERYONE struggles, gets frustrated,  has hurdles to over come, even if its not always obvious to me. I think that is what God wants me to know, I'm special because I'm me NOT because I've stumbled along the way or veered from my faith or just blatantly screwed up.

This is Where I'm at

It is hard not having Mallory, although we talked very little as time passed, she left a huge impact.  I do not really understand death or why God chooses certain paths for people, I am stuck asking why a lot and questioning my faith.  More than anything my faith reminds me that I am not in control and there is only one constant in my life….. GOD.  I guess I am a huge “why” questioner, in every aspect of life. (yes, I was the three year old that asked why after each answer) How do you cope, how do you fill the holes in your heart and how do you have the strength to keep picking your self up?

So, Hello, I’m Erin Visalli Erin-control freak, constant questioner, hard to satisfy-Visalli. Its nice to meet you!

Its not that I question GOD, I just question his method. Yes, did I mention I was very contradictory sometimes too? I just miss Mallory and others that have passed, why couldn’t he have stopped at the end of sixth day (“saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good” - Genesis 1:31). I know the answer and deep down it completely makes sense, at times though pain, sin & anger get the best of me and I forget.

Sadness, Tragedy, Loss, Pain… all the ills of the world exist because of a key part in having a relationship with God: all the ills exist as a reminder than sins have consequences and everyone needs a Savior.

I am not questioning God, I guess I am scared to think of a world without the impacts certain people have made to not only my life but also my families and even the overall public. I question everything, even when I shouldn't, I would rather open my mouth and inquire than to keep quite and ponder. Some of my conversations with God are rough and looking back I cannot believe the intensity and evil I felt, let alone expressed.  I’m not ashamed by it, because that is me, just embarrassed that I forgot my values and religion. The uncertainty of life scares me, I think more than anything I am scared of my plan not working out. (Yes, I’m a control freak, I’m working on it) I carefully step forward and sometimes miss opportunities because of fear. Trust is difficult.

I think about Mallory a lot. Maybe not the times we spent together or even how I miss her. But I think of her spirit and how no matter what, she danced. I have spent many many many hours, dollars and tears worrying about what happens after you dance. Pure exhaustion can any describe the energy put into my fears and the energy others have put into dragging me on the dance floor.

It has made me, know “me” better and understand my relationship with God better. It is by no means perfect, (nowhere near it) and I do not always agree BUT I think I understand HIM a bit more.

The past few months, I think something really is starting to click.   

Dance and then you'll see, but never stand on the sides plotting every step.

Now I do (occasionally, baby steps people) watch my feet but they are moving! I have spent the last 3 or 4 semesters worrying about how my dreams and desires have U-turned my college plan too many times. Completely freaked out, to a point where I barely tried, just to keep me standing still, safe.... All that standing, planning, and contemplating did was produce a path that I didn't even know where I was going. Not that I really much more now BUT that planning and standing path was the complete opposite of me.

I just realized how unhappy I was and how living life scared the crap out of me. I think that path was rough and bumpy, but it taught me a lot and who I was trying to get out and cause a big detour. I kept running away, stuffing my pain and eventually exploding…. A cyclic cycle I’ve been stuck in.

This cycle I’ve allowed fear to keep me in has handed me many very very very VERY hard mouthful to swallow BUT it’s made me who I am.  (yeah I never really caught on easy method being EASIER) Through all this, I dug me out and looked hard into the mirror (it only cracked a little).

I honestly have a long way to go, but I am trying..... actively trying and actively putting effort in staying on the dance floor. Its been awhile and consecutive. (which speaks mountains)

Some where some how, Mallory reminds me to keep dancing, even if you have 2 left feet or only 1 leg! Its starting to click and I cannot remember when those clicks sparked anything or kept me going. I got a HUGE mountain in front of me, but I’ve started and that is a lot. Yeah maybe the fact that I'm "growing up" and have traveled down almost every dead end or dangerous road adds to it, but Mallory is a big part, she reminds me that rhythm has nothing to do with dancing in the rain!....

Thank you Mallory for the extra push, the extra faith, the extra pair of heels, you pick me up to make use of me, to keep me on the dance floor, no matter the conditions!